Avoid Common Pitfalls

1. Avoid overusing expletives at the beginning of sentences

Expletives are phrases of the form it + be-verb or there + be-verb. Such expressions can be rhetorically effective for emphasis in some situations, but overuse or unnecessary use of expletive constructions creates wordy prose. Take the following example: "It is imperative that we find a solution." The same meaning could be expressed with this more succinct wording: "We must find a solution." But using the expletive construction allows the writer to emphasize the urgency of the situation by placing the word imperative near the beginning of the sentence, so the version with the expletive may be preferable.

Still, you should generally avoid excessive or unnecessary use of expletives. The most common kind of unnecessary expletive construction involves an expletive followed by a noun and a relative clause beginning with that, which, or who. In most cases, concise sentences can be created by eliminating the expletive opening, making the noun the subject of the sentence, and eliminating the relative pronoun.

Wordy:

(9 words)

Concise:

(6 words)

Wordy:

(8 words)

Concise:

(5 words)

Wordy:

(15 words)

Concise:

(12 words)

2. Avoid overusing noun forms of verbs

Use verbs when possible rather than noun forms known as nominalizations. Sentences with many nominalizations usually have forms of be as the main verbs. Using the action verbs disguised in nominalizations as the main verbs—instead of forms of be—can help to create engaging rather than dull prose.

Wordy:

(10 words)

Concise:

(4 words)

Wordy:

(10 words)

Concise:

(8 words)

3. Avoid unnecessary infinitive phrases

Some infinitive phrases can be converted into finite verbs or brief noun phrases. Making such changes also often results in the replacement of a be-verb with an action verb.

Wordy:

(15 words)

Concise:

(8 words)

Wordy:

(23 words)

Concise:

(18 words)

4. Avoid circumlocutions in favor of direct expressions

Circumlocutions are commonly used roundabout expressions that take several words to say what could be said more succinctly. We often overlook them because many such expressions are habitual figures of speech. In writing, though, they should be avoided since they add extra words without extra meaning. Of course, occasionally you may for rhetorical effect decide to use, say, an expletive construction instead of a more succinct expression. These guidelines should be taken as general recommendations, not absolute rules.

Wordy:

(2/4 words)

Concise:

(1 word)

Wordy:

(5 words)

Concise:

(3 words)

Below are some other words which may simplify lengthier circumlocutions.

• "because," "since," "why" =
  • the reason for
  • for the reason that
  • owing/due to the fact that
  • in light of the fact that
  • considering the fact that
  • on the grounds that
  • this is why

• "when" =
  • on the occasion of
  • in a situation in which
  • under circumstances in which

• "about" =
  • as regards
  • in reference to
  • with regard to
  • concerning the matter of
  • where ________ is concerned

• "must," "should" =
  • it is crucial that
  • it is necessary that
  • there is a need/necessity for
  • it is important that
  • cannot be avoided

• "can" =
  • is able to
  • has the opportunity to
  • has the capacity for
  • has the ability to

• "may," "might," "could" =
  • it is possible that
  • there is a chance that
  • it could happen that
  • the possibility exists for

Wordy:

(10 words)

Concise:

(6 words)

Wordy:

(8 words)

Concise:

(5 words)

Wordy:

(12 words)

Concise:

(9 words)